There were three girls a blond, red head, and brunette.
They just robbed a bank and are running away from the cops they
hide in three potatoe bags. The cop goes and kicks the first bag
the red head says meow. The cop goes oh just a cat. Then he goes
and kicks the second bag the brunette says bark. The cop goes oh
just a dog. He goes to the third bag and kicks it the blonde says
There was a blonde and a few business men in an elevator.
One of the business men spotted some white liquid on the floor."It
looks like cum," he said. "Smells like it too," said
another. Then the blonde puts her finger in it and licks it and
said,"Nope no-one from this building." !!
Joh McKay 16/12/2002
1- what do you call a blonde with dyed red hair?
2-why are blondes like twisters?
**while their around their wet and wild but when they leave they
they take your car your t.v your house............!!***
LR aka Mech-manic ..choi! 15/12/2002
Hey there. Been reading up on your blonde jokes...you
did a good job.
These should be added though:
Q. What would you call a smart blond?
A. A "Golden Retriever"
Q. How do you put the sparkle in a blond's eyes?
A. Flash a flashlight in her ears.
Q. Why do blonds wear shoulder pad?
A. So they don't get hurt when they say "I don't know..."
their head from side to side.
Q. How do you kill a blond?
A. Put metal spikes in the shoulder pads and ask her a question.
Hope you like 'em!
Q: how come blondes cant count to 70
A: because 69 is a mouthful.
Two blondes were going to DisneyLand and then they
saw a sign that said "DisneyLand Left". So they turned
around and went home.
There was a blonde, a bernette, and a red head.They
were running from the police. The bernette hid in a barrel. The
red hid in a box. The blonde hid in a potato sack. The cop ran over
to the barrel to open it, but the bernette screeches,"MEOW!
MEOW!" the cop said ,"oh it's just a cat." he ran
to the box. the bernette barked like a dog. So the blonde was aparently
arrested because her response was,"POTATO! POTATO
Two Blondes were walking down the street. One spots
broken mirror on the ground. Picks it up, looks into
it and says, "This girl looks familiar!!!". The other
grabs it and says,"You idiot, it's me!!!".
Mercerville N.J. 30/11/2002
Why does it take longer to make a blonde snow man
than a regular 1?
Cuz u have 2 hallow out the head
There was three girls in the dessert thier car broke
down. Each of them grabed something and took off walking. the berunett
took the water, the red-head took the ice and the blond took the
car door. When they were found they asked them why did you take
the things you took?T he brunette said I took the water so I could
drink it when I get dehydrated. The red-head said I took the ice
so I could rub it on my body when it gets hot.then they talked to
the blond. She said I took the car door so when it gets hot I can
roll down the car window.
Marylou Perez 29/11/2002
What does a blonde and a turtle have in common? (A)
once on their back they`re screwed.
An officer is patroling the highway and he ses this
car swerving on and off the road so he pulls it over and its a blonde."ma'am
why were u swerving?Well I saw this tree on the right so I swerved
2 the left there was1 on the right so I swerved 2 the left.The officer
looks in her car and says"Ma'am thats yur air freshner".
Cody H 15/11/2002
What do you call a blonde hanging upside down?
............a brunette with bad breath
What did the dumb blonde say when she spilt her cheerios
on the floor?
Did you hear there is a new blonde paint? It's not
very bright, but it spreads real easy.
Craig Mills 25/10/2002
A cop sees a blonde curving in the middle of the road.
He pulls her over and asks why r u surving through the road like
that? she said cuz there is a bunch of trees in my way. The cop
says umm ma'am, that is your air freshener....
There was a blonde that had never rode a horse before
so she put her money in the box and started riding. She eventually
started sliding off the side of it and was hitting her head on the
ground about to die when the walmart man came and unplugged the
There was some men that worked on a building and there was a blonde
that brought sandwhiches everyday and a brunette wo brought chicken
everyday and a redhead that brought tacos everyday. they all said
that if they brought the same thing tomorrow they would jump off
of the building so the next day the redhead brought chicken instead
of tacos and the brunette brought tacos instead of chicken but the
blonde still brought a sandwhich so he jumped off of the building
and at his funeral his wife said "if only he would have asked
me his lunch" HE MADE HIS OWN LUNCH EVERYDAY!!!!!!!
Lacey H 21/10/2002
Two blondes walk into a toy store. The first blonde
yells out "fifty-two days." The cashier at the store asks,
"fifty-two days what? what is that supposed to mean."
The second blonde turns to the cahier and triumphantly says, "You
see this puzzle, we finished it in fifty-two days and the box says
two to three years."
Q: why did the blonde stop using the pill for birth
A: It kept falling out.
Andrea Johnson Vacaville, Ca 13/10/2002
How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?
101. One to hold the light bulb the other 100 to rotate the house
Greg Bell 4/10/2002
A group of blondes in a class at the University were
given the assignment to measure the height of a flagpole. So they
went out to the flagpole with ladders and tape measures, and they're
falling off the ladders, dropping the tape measures - the whole
thing was just a mess.
An engineering student comes along, sees what they're trying to
do, walks over, pulls the flagpole out of the ground, lays it flat,
measures it from end to end, gives the measurement to one of the
blondes and walks away.
After the engineer had gone, one blonde turned to another and laughed.
"Isn't that just like a dumb engineer? We're looking for the
height and he gives us the length!"
A blonde, red head, and burnette all asked there dad
the Red heads question was: Dad, why did you name me Lily? Her dad
said, when you were born a lily fell on your head so we named you
The Burnette question: Dad, why did you name me Daisy? He said,
when you were born a daisy fell on your head so we named you daisy.
The blonde's question: ajfksdhsjkfhsdjkf jhfasjkhfas jsdhfja jk?
Her dad said, Shut up Cinderblock!!!!!
There are two blondes traveling down to Florida to
Walt Disney World. So they saw a sign and it said Disney World left.
So they went back home.
What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you?
Run because the grenade is in her mouth.
Greg Swanson 4/9/2002
Two blondes decided to go to DisneyWorld. They're
driving down the freeway and the see a sign that says: CLEAN RESTROOMS
NEXT TWO MILES. So they clean all the restrooms for the next two
miles. There almost to DisneyWorld and they see a sign that says
DISNEY WORLD LEFT so they turned around and went home.
A blond wants to ride a horse so she gets on and goes for a ride.
she starts to slip off. she holds on as tight as she can but she
can't hold on anymore. Her head starts hitting the ground. The Wal-mart
guy sees her and comes out and unplugs the horse.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the cops. They
see three potato sacks. All three of them each jump in a potato
sacks. The police come up and kick the sack that the redhead was
in and she says: MEOW. The cop says: OH JUST A KITTY. He goes to
the sack with the brunette in it and she says: WOOF WOOF!. The cop
says: OH JUST A PUPPY. He goes to the bag with the blonde in it
and kicks it and she says: POTATO!
A blonde and a brunette go for a walk. The brunette says: OH A DEAD
BIRD. The blond looks up and says: WHERE?
Jo Wilson 2/9/2002
What does a blonde and a bird have in common?
They both like to peck at worms
Mary Stewart 2/9/2002
Wat did tha blonde say when tha doctor told her she
is it mine????
Lewis Horan 28/8/2002
Q.How are blondes live vaccum cleaners?
A.They suck, blow and get laid in a closet.
Q.Why wasn't the virgin Mary a blonde?
A.If she was, she'd just be Mary
Claire Williamson 18/8/2002
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake. He finds
his way to a bar
stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells
the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The
falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next
him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, you should know
1- The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 - The bouncer is a blonde gal.
3 - I'm a 6 feet tall, 200-pound blonde woman with a black belt
4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional
5 - The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares,
"Nah... Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
5/8/2002 Erin E
A blonde is in a shop and decides that she no longer
wants to be called bimbo, stupid etc.. so she buys some brown hair
dye, a couple of weeks later (hair now brown!) she moves out of
stratford to move to leeds, one day she gos into a pawn shop and
sees a really nice t.v. so she shouts over to the shopkeeper and
says, "hey! how much is this TV" and the shopkeeper replied
"your a blonde aren't you?" and thinking how can he know?
she says"yep, how did you know that?" and the shopkeeper
says "'cause thats a microwave!"
Studley, Nr Stratford 5/8/2002